A squadron leader, just off on a mission, runs past, and dashes into a Nissen hut
CAPTION: Somewhere in England, 1944
The squadron leader enters an RAF officers’ mess and takes off his helmet
- Bovril (Terry J.)
- Morning, squadron leader.
- Squadron Leader (Eric)
- What-ho, Squiffy.
- Bovril
- How was it?
- Squadron Leader
- Top hole. Bally Jerry pranged his kite right in the how’s your father. Hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper’s and caught his can in the Bertie.
- Bovril
- Er, I’m afraid I don’t quite follow you, squadron leader.
- Squadron Leader
- It’s perfectly ordinary banter, Squiffy. Bally Jerry … pranged his kite right in the how’s yer father … hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper’s and caught his can in the Bertie.
- Bovril
- No, I’m just not understanding banter at all well today. Give us it slower.
- Squadron Leader
- Banter’s not the same if you say it slower, Squiffy.
- Bovril
- Hold on, then. (shouts) Wingco!
- Wingco (Graham)
- Yes!
- Bovril
- Bend an ear to the squadron leader’s banter for a sec, would you?
- Wingco
- Can do.
- Bovril
- Jolly good.
- Wingco
- Fire away.
- Squadron Leader
- (draws a deep breath and looks slightly uncertain, then starts even more deliberately then before) Bally Jerry … pranged his kite … right in the how’s your father … hairy blighter … dicky-birdied … … feathered back on his Sammy … took a waspy … flipped over on his Betty Harper’s … and caught his can in the Bertie.
- Wingco
- … No, don’t understand that banter at all.
- Squadron Leader
- Something up with my banter, chaps?
- Pilot (Michael)
- Bunch of monkeys on your ceiling, sir! Grab your egg and fours and let’s get the bacon delivered.
- Wingco
- Do you understand that?
- Squadron Leader
- No, didn’t get a word of it.
- Wingco
- Sorry old man, we don’t understand your banter.
- Pilot
- You know … bally ten-penny ones dropping in the custard … (searching for the words) um … Charlie Choppers chucking a handful …
- Wingco
- No, no … sorry.
- Bovril
- Say it a bit slower, old chap.
- Pilot
- Slower banter, sir?
- Wingco
- Ra-ther!
- Pilot
- Um … sausage squad up the blue end!
- Squadron Leader
- No, still don’t get it.
- Pilot
- Um … cabbage crates coming over the briny?
- Squadron Leader
- No.
- Wingco, Pilot and Bovril
- No, no …
- Voice Over (Michael)
- But by then it was too late. The first cabbage crates hit London by July 7th. That was just the beginning…